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Witnesses commented that childhood experiences of separation and isolation made it more difficult to form close attachments with their own partners and children. Witnesses who were sexually abused described a particular difficulty in relation to intimate relationships in adulthood. I was very angry with my husband and then I said “He doesn’t deserve this”... I had to let him alone...he was a good man ... I had to look at my own issues... we are still together anyway!

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Witnesses who were admitted to hospital from families where there were close and affectionate relationships described being shocked to find themselves both witnessing and being subject to abuse they had not previously encountered. A number of these witnesses described being now fearful of authority and generally more anxious in their adult lives than their siblings who had remained at home. Two (2) of these witnesses commented on the reactivated trauma they experienced when their own children were admitted to hospital many years later.

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The lack of formal education combined with years of being treated as a sick and disabled person while in hospital was reported by many witnesses to have had a long-term negative impact on their lives. Alcohol abuse, depression and suicidal thoughts were reported by approximately one quarter of the witnesses as life-long consequences of their childhood abuse experiences. Counselling was reported to have helped some witnesses address issues related to their past.

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A number of witnesses reported that they attended second-level school but were unable to successfully complete their education due to the trauma of their abusive experiences. They described being fearful, unable to concentrate and distracted by the risk of further abuse or memories of past abuse. Seventeen (17) witnesses gave accounts of attending third-level education as mature students.

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Most witnesses reported having stable and secure housing arrangements as illustrated in the following table:
Accommodation Males Females Total witnesses
Owner occupiers 36 12 48
Local authority/council housing 7 0 7
Private rented accommodation 5 0 5
With relatives 4 1 5
Sheltered housing 1 0 1
Hostel 1 0 1
Unavailable 2 1 3
Total 56 14 70

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Fifty five (55) witnesses described having stable accommodation arrangements at the time of their hearings, either as home owners or as council housing tenants. A number of the 15 witnesses in other types of accommodation reported a history of unsettled lives, broken relationships and periods of ill-health.

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During the course of their hearings witnesses provided general information about their physical and mental health, either directly or in the context of describing their current life circumstances. For the purpose of writing this Report the Committee categorised the witnesses’ physical and mental health status as good, reasonable or poor based on the information they provided regarding their past and current health history.

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Witnesses more frequently reported experiencing good physical health than good mental health. The following table illustrates the status of physical health described by witnesses:
Physical health status Males Females Total witnesses
Good 32 9 41
Reasonable 20 4 24
Poor 4 1 5
Total 56 14 70

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The majority of witnesses indicated that they experienced good physical health, while some may have had age-related conditions that required treatment. The five witnesses who described poor physical health reported chronic illness, some of which they associated with trauma and their childhood abuse experience or with disability. Others described poor health in the context of recent illness, surgery or accident. Witnesses who described having reasonable physical health described some stress-related conditions including chronic fatigue syndrome, irritable bowel syndrome and physical conditions associated with alcohol abuse. The most commonly reported areas of physical ill-health for this group of witnesses were: arthritis, diabetes, back pain, heart, gastric and thyroid conditions. Two (2) witnesses reported having had hepatitis.

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The following table illustrates the witnesses’ current mental health status as described by them:
Mental health status Males Females Total witnesses
Good 23 5 28
Reasonable 17 7 24
Poor 16 2 18
Total 56 14 70

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Witnesses whose mental health was categorised as good gave accounts of being generally able to leave the memories of their past abuse behind, and being sustained by supportive relationships and a fulfilled work life. Six (6) of those witnesses who described generally good mental health also reported a past history of depression and alcohol abuse, and had attended mental health services and counselling in relation to their past difficulties.

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Twenty four (24) witnesses gave accounts of having reasonably good mental health while they also reported histories of depression, suicidal thoughts and attempts. Many described a level of continued distress and alcohol abuse leading to some day-to-day difficulties that were manageable. At that stage of my life I was heavy into drink ... huge problem. I was into drugs as well ... I was going downhill. I started stealing for my habits ... The drinking got so bad I decided myself I had to do something about it,...(I was drinking )... a bottle of whiskey or brandy a day ... It was great for me at the time to get over those years, it helped me black out... (memories of abuse)....I went away to ...treatment centre... When I was there drying out ... I told part of my story ... (of sexual abuse) ...

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There was a marked gender difference between witnesses who described poor mental health. Sixteen (16) male and two female witnesses, reported a history of repeated admissions to psychiatric hospitals, many suicide attempts, disabling anxiety and depression, leading at times to isolation and withdrawal from social and family life. A number of witnesses reported that their past abuse had a profound impact on all areas of their lives and that they were unable to benefit from the help that they had repeatedly sought. Six (6) male and one female witness gave accounts of substance abuse.

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The most frequently reported effect of childhood abuse on the adult lives of witnesses who reported abuse in primary and second-level schools was the impact on their emotional wellbeing and the consequences for their personal, family and social relationships. Table 111 illustrates the effects described by the 56 male and 14 female witnesses. The effects are not mutually exclusive and were not prioritised by witnesses.
Male witnesses Female witnesses
Effects on adult life* Number of reports Effects on adult life* Number of reports
Counselling required 38 Lack of self-worth 9
Alcohol abuse 28 Anxious and fearful 8
Lack of trust 25 Counselling required 8
Angry 24 Abuse not easily forgotten 7
Loner 24 Feelings related to being a victim 7
Abuse not easily forgotten 23 Feeling isolated 6
Lack of self-worth 21 Issues of self-worth 6
Suicidal feelings or attempt 21 Angry 5
Feelings related to being a victim 18 Mood instability 5
Unable to settle 18 Somatic symptoms 5
Post-traumatic effect 17 Suicidal feelings or attempt 5
Anxious and fearful 15 Alcohol abuse 4
Mood instability 15 Feeling different from peers 4
Withdrawal 14 Feelings related to being powerless 4
Feeling different from peers 13 Loner 4
Nightmares 12 Post-traumatic effect 4
Feeling isolated 11 Sexual problems 4
Gender and sexual identity problems 11 Overprotective of children 3
Sleep disturbance 11 Withdrawal 3
Aggressive behaviour – physical 10 Tearfulness 2
Aggressive behaviour – verbal 10 Eating disorder 2
Sexual problems 10 Issues of self-blame 2
Unable to show feelings to partner 9 Overly-compliant behaviour 2
Somatic symptoms 8 Substance abuse 2
Over harsh with children 6 Aggressive behaviour – physical 1
Substance abuse 6 Aggressive behaviour – psychological 1
Unable to show feelings to children 6 Aggressive behaviour – verbal 1
Tearfulness 5 Fear of failure 1
Feelings related to being powerless 5 Issues of needing approval 1
Overprotective of children 5 Nightmares 1
Issues of needing approval 5 Over harsh with children 1
Eating Disorder 4 Unable to settle 1
Issues of self-blame 4 Unable to show feelings to children 1
Aggressive behaviour – psychological 3 Unable to show feelings to partner 1

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Many witnesses reported difficulties encountered in their day-to-day lives, and stated that enduring anger and distress continued to affect them. A female witness stated ‘there was nothing normal about life’. Another witness described herself as an angry person who puts on a mask to hide her pain, sadness and loneliness: ‘You are never sure when it ... (memories of abuse)... will raise its ugly head’. A number of male witnesses commented that they had suppressed memories of abuse at a cost to their personal and family relationships: ‘You put up a front, I blanked it out’. Another witnesses commented: The anger started coming at me again. I went on an anger management course... the anger went on and on. I was still saying nothing ... (to spouse) ... I broke down and told her the whole thing .... It explained to her a lot of the behavioural problems I had, because I had good positions...(employment)... but I never let anyone come near me...

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